Wedding Day
by Sutoriitoenzeru-Street Angel
Summary: One shot humour fic where Jou gets married, please read it if you need a laugh!


**~This takes place seven years after the end of Battle City, I hope it appeals to your humour! ^_^**

The music started and the groom emerged from his waiting room and everyone's heads turned to look. The bride wore a beautiful white gown that cascaded to the floor with one more layer fluttering out of the bottom. A white, satin sash ran twice around her waist before ending at the back in a large bow, the tails of which led down to the floor. A pure silk chocker adorned her neck, dainty white slippers on her feet and a ring of fake, white flowers crowned her head with translucent veil hanging form it.

The groom wore ironed white trousers and well polished shoes, a crisp, cream shirt reviled only slightly by the white over-jacket that he wore. A white bow tie came around his neck to form at the front in a burst of efficiency. He looked to his side to the similarly clad best man, except in black with a white shirt, his long time friend who had had a growth spurt in the past few years.

"Ready Jou-kun?" asked the tri-colour haired boy who stood beside him with sparkling violet eyes.

"As ready as I'll ever be Yuugi-kun," replied the one and only Jounouchi Katsuya as he took his best friend and best man's arm. Yuugi then led Jou down the red carpet clad isle of the small-secluded church, up to the alter, where the bride waited with the head bridesmaid, Anzu.

As the words of binding began Yuugi slipped his hand into Anzu's and they entwined the fingers, two golden rings flashing on their fingers. They had gotten married a year ago and now it was two of their most treasured friend's turn. In the crowd were any people and some of them had gone out of their way to come today.

Standing by the four at the front were Mokuba and Shizuka, Shizuka wore a slightly pink tinged dress and held a basket of confetti ready for later. Mokuba was in black with a red bow tie and had his arm linked with Shizuka's, the two had been going out for a while now, ever since Seto had gotten back from America.

Watching were Jou's mother and father who had gotten back together a long while back and than there was Jou best friend, Honda Hiroto. There was also Ryou and his Yami: Bakura, Esper Roba and his four younger brothers, Rebecca Hawkins and her Grandfather, beside them were Yami and Sugoroku. Ryouji Otogi has come along, even Seto Kaiba turned up, there was Isis Ishtar and to the surprise of everyone else there that knew them, Malik and Mariku Ishtar, Rishid sat beside them and that concluded the party.

"Jounouchi Shizuka Katsuya, do you promise to take, Mai Aisu Kujaku in sickness and in health, in living and in dieing so long as you both shall live?" the priest asked looking at Jou who looking rather flustered and needed an elbow from Yuugi to prompt him to say something.

"I do," Mai smiled beneath her veil at this, as she waited for the priest to turn to her.

"Mai Aisu Kujaku, do you promise to take, Jounouchi Shizuka Katsuya, in sickness and in health, in living and in dieing so long as you both shall live?"

"I do," Mai said turning her head to look slightly at Jou whom she could see was smiling proudly.

"The rings, if you please," the priest prompted, looking at Mokuba, stepping back slightly to allow the teenager room.

Mokuba stepped forwards and fished out two boxes from his pocket opening one and lifting it for Jou to take, "Go for it Jou-kun," he said reassuringly and Yuugi grinned at him. Jou nodded and took the ring from the velvet-covered box taking Mai's left hand and slipping the golden ring onto her index finger.

"Mai," Shizuka offered holding out a second box and the blonde haired women took the ring gratefully.

"Thanks hun," she whispered as she turned to face Jou slipping the ring on his left, index finger.

"You may now kiss the bride," the priest announced proudly retreating to the back halls and left the couple to their friends. Jou lifted the translucent white cloth over Mai's head and kissed her gently, with that one action their lives together were sealed and a round of applause and cheering followed.

"Come on," Shizuka cheered taking up her basket and parading down the isle throwing flower petals and confetti all over the floor and into the air as Mokuba walked by her side, Jou and Mai followed behind them, bringing up the rear of their little procession were Yuugi and Anzu.

The got outside and everyone pilled off, using Seto's limos' that he had so generously offered for the occasion they made their way to the Kaiba mansion were the reception as to be held. Bride and groom travelled alone in a white limo and the others followed in the other black ones.

Soon they pulled up at the drive and everyone pilled out, Jou's mum and dad had headed home form the Church having to get back to work, their schedules busy enough as it was. Rishid headed back tot eh Ishtar's mansion in order to tend to matters that were occurring there, Sugoroku went back tot eh Game shop followed by Arthur and Rebecca leaving a very close circle of friends. Even Malik and Mariku could be seen as friends now, either of them wanted to be Pharaoh anymore, though neither could be called sociable.

After a while they all entered the dinning hall where several different assorted racks that were some of Mai and Jou's favourites were playing. A huge pile of presents towered high above all present at one end of the long hall. There was a table near it that trembled under the weight of the gigantic cake that lay upon its polished surface. Ten layers of multiple chocolates with assorted add-ons and cream at the top of which was a white plastic arch and two candle figures, one of Jou and another of Mai, both were lit. On the other layers were candle versions of all of their present and mission friends and family each letting off a small glow.

Everyone sat down and there was defiantly a wide ranger of expressions set across all of those present. Yami was smirking at Jou and gave him the thumbs up when he looked at him, making Jou grin as a result.

Yuugi was smiling at him while his fingers were stilled laced with Anzu's on one hand and Yami on the other, Anzu herself was smiling also, happy for the new couple.

Shizuka looked as though Mokuba had just stuffed light bulbs in her eyes they shone so much, her hands were clasped and she was blushing seeing as Mokuba's arm was around her waist. Mokuba himself was grinning at Jou and wined ta Mai who smiled brightly.

Honda gave his buddy a double thumb up and winked at him grinning at Mai, "You keep your eye on him Mai," he advised: Mai laughed and Jou looked miffed, but only in fun.

Isis was smiling warmly at the two as she regarded the beautifully decorated room, blushing furiously when she felt someone's arm go around her waist. She looked up to see the face of the proud CEO of Kaiba Corp. none other than Seto Kaiba. He smirked at Jou who smirked down giving him a thumb up and Mai winked at him.

Ryouji was tossing some specially made dice up in the air; both had one chibi face of Jou and Mai on them, two hearts and two rings. She smiled at Jou and rolled them, expertly, across the table so they landed with Mai's face and Jou's face pointing upwards.

Then there was Malik and Mariku, both were smirking at Jou and Jou had to admit that both looked rather good in black suits, Malik better than Mariku. Somehow Isis must have managed, with Rishid's help surely, to pry the two Egyptians ever present jewellery of them and it looked better.

Ryou was smiling brightly at the pair while leaning back in his chair with his hands in his lap. Bakura two was leaning back in his chair, arms crossed behind his head and his eyes were closed contentedly. However, he opened one when he felt Jou's eyes on him, he smirked and gave him a piece sign over his head. Jou grinned and gave a piece sign back and kissed Mai again.

She giggled and looked at the ring on her finger, "Mai Katsuya, Mai _Katsuya_," she emphasised the second sounding of her knew, last name.

"That's right sis," Shizuka said allowed making Mai look at her, "Mai Katsuya, welcome to the family." She grinned and everyone present applauded for the new couple as Jou kissed Mai again making her grin giddily.

"Can we eat now?" Malik asked sounding bored and suddenly got his head slapped by an infuriated Isis.

"Yeh, sure," Jou said through his laughter and he looked at his bride who was filling her plate with assorted pieces of the delicious food selection. 'This was the biggest…and best decision of my life,' he contemplated internally, filling up his own plate, 'funny, I didn't feel like that this morning,' he chuckled at the thought.

Yuugi had been panicking Jou had supposed to have been there a long time ago but the blonde still hadn't shown and then Anzu clicked her fingers, Malik, Mariku, Yuugi, Yami, Ryou and Bakura turned to her. She then told them that she thought Jou would try and make a run and so he had.

Shizuka had woken him up that morning, like she did every morning, and then told him he was getting married. He panicked he flung on some cloths and dashed out the door and nearly made it out the back door in the kitchen. Then Shizuka blocked the door and crossed her arms in front of her chest telling him to go back up stairs and get ready.

In a vain attempt to get away he headed for the front door but was met by Yami, Mariku AND Bakura. They, along with Shizuka, marched Jou up the stairs, Yami helped him get changed and then they marched him to the church. Jou had gotten a couple of options though:

1) Go to the Shadow Realm and come out when it was time for the wedding…

…or 2) Go to the Shadow Realm, be attacked by Duel Monsters and then get married….

…or 3) Just get married.

The only reason, he discovered, that Bakura had gone along with it was that they would have had to deal with a very pissed off Anzu, then a very pissed of Yami and Yuugi and on top of that a very upset Mai. And that, my friends, was not something either of the psychotic duo could handle.

And after all that, he'd gone with number three deeming it to be the least health threatening. At the end of it all, now that he had Mai, eh wouldn't trade her for anything in the world.

After everyone had finished eating to some extent Jou cleared his throat and stood up, easily attracting everyone's attention. "Thank-you for coming everyone and I hope you're enjoying yourselves, anyway," he coughed quite deliberately but no one seemed to notice, either that or they just didn't care, "I think it's time for the speeches, Yuugi." The blonde sat down and used his hand to indicate Yuugi who blushed slightly and stood up, the whole company went silent and waited.

Yuugi cleared his throat and began, "First of all I'd like to thank Jou for being such a good friend," Jou grinned, "and then I'd like to scold him for taking a part of the Millennium Puzzle when we first met," and then Jou's face fell, there were some laughs at this and then Yuugi continued. "I would now like to thank Mai for being such a help at the end of Duellist Kingdom and all," Mai smiled, "And then I'd like to say she's mean for being such an ass at Duellist Kingdom," and everyone laughed at this and Mai went bright red.

"Yuugi, language," Anzu fake scolded and Yuugi chuckled before carrying on with his speech.

"I'd like to say that they are perfect for each other even though their train's oh thought seem to clash," Jou groaned at this, when Yuugi said he'd pay him back for his best man speech he didn't think it would be like this. "Mai concentrates on money and her exceptional good looks," this got him a hit on the back of the leg from Anzu causing him to wince slightly, "and Jou's, food, and who he can get to make it for him."

"I'd also like to congratulate them both on becoming such great duellists and I just hope that neither of their big mouths will get in the way of their relationship," Yuugi laughed when he had to duck flying objects sent his way by an infuriated, yet amused, Mai.

"That's defiantly enough from you Aibou, I know you have to pay him back, but isn't that a bit much?" Yami asked looking at his flustered light.

"Not at all," Yuugi replied grinning broadly and Anzu hugged him: and he kissed her, Yami just watched, like a vulture waiting…

Seto then coughed loudly as he stood up and Jou's eyes widened, he hadn't expected _Kaiba_, _Seto_ to speak. "I would just like to say, I hope you keep the Inu on a tight leash Mai, or he might get away," Seto smirked and Jou looked slightly angered.

"Oh don't worry, Jou's loyal, he'll just run back to his mistress," Mai replied and Jou sunk in his seat and everyone laughed, but a kiss from Mai brought Jou's spirit's back.

"Whose next?" Shizuka called out.

"Me," Honda stated proudly as he shot from his seat like something had just bitten his rear end, but it hadn't, thank God. "I would first of all like to thank Jou very much for being my only friend way before we met all you guys, then I'd like to throw my fork at him," he did so, "for all the times we went through with his schemes and got caught." An 'Ow' rang through the room when the fork hit Jou, "I'd then like to say that it wouldn't have been any fun without ya bro," both boys grinned at each other.

"The first time I ever really met Mai was at Duellist Kingdom and I do not appreciate being called a cheerleader," the Yami's snorted, Malik snickered and some of the others chuckled behind their hands, "that's Anzu's job." He ducked Anzu's flying fork and stuck his tongue out at the fuming brunette who was silenced by Yami's mouth on hers. "But I'd like to thank her for the great friend she became, and all the help, which made up for all the times she acted like a stick was shoved up her…" his mouth was covered by Anzu's hand.

"That's plenty from you," Anzu stated matter of factly, and no, I mean NO ONE, messed with Anzu when she was in this state of mind, "just sit there and be quiet," she commanded shoving him into his seat and going back to her own.

"My turn," Shizuka cried joyfully and leapt off her seat, cards in hand, "I'd like to thank Yuugi first of all for giving Jou the prize money, and then Jou, for being the best big brother in the world and for being there for me when I needed it most. You're the greatest Jou and I wish you and Mai the best of luck. As for you Mai, girl's rule, see, I still haven't forgotten that, and now it's your turn to take care of my brother. Welcome to the family," Shizuka stated happily as she sat down with Mokuba.

"I guess that about wraps that up," Jou stated leaning back in his chair and everyone nearly had a heart attack when Malik stood up. "Holy cow, Malik wants to say something, this can't be good, either that or hell just froze over," Malik looked slightly put out at this outburst but continued none the less.

"First of all I'd like to say that I'm no good at this sentimental crap so here goes," he coughed and then began fully, "I would just like to wish you both good luck, long happy lives, and lots of children so they can annoy everybody else and keep the fun up," everyone looked at him in surprise for that statement. "I must also insist that they do not choose me as Godfather," he sighed, "otherwise they'll probably end up with some dead children, or me committing suicide."

"When I first came into contact with Jou it wasn't for the best of circumstances, in fact, I turned him against his best man, to-be at the time, but anyway. I'm sorry if you still hate me for that, much the same for Mai, except I trapped her soul in a sand timer but may I also point out." he took this time to glare at his Yami, "It wasn't actually me, it was a certain blonde haired, Egyptian counterpart." Mariku sunk in his chair till he was nearly under the table, and everyone laughed at this.

"Next I would like to thank him for the very _boring_ fill in on his life in the first two hours of Yuugi saying I was his friend. For this, I will hold Yuugi responsible but I got my revenge last year at his wedding," Malik smirked at the memory and everyone snickered, Anzu looked miffed though.

"I am also very surprised that we have not yet run out of air and that the world hasn't either suffered mass suffocation or starvation due to Jou's appetite and exceptionally large mouth. I would like to commend him on his ability to say more than us in the space of one minute, stuff his face at the same time and still manage to use up less air." Everyone except Jou snorted, Jou just crossed his arms and mock glared at the Egyptian.

He then cleared his throat and took out another speech card, while some of the others groaned, "I'm not sure letting Malik speak was such a good idea," Mai commented looking at Jou who nodded in agreement.

"I will never forget the way Jou always used to stare at me with love and affection radiating in his…" Malik trailed off and raised an eyebrow as he looked at his cards. Bakura snorted at the ridiculous turn the speech had suddenly taken. Jou then side glanced at Mai who had brought out a nail file from no were and was giving herself a manicure. He grinned at his new wife and silently thanked her for stopping Malik from saying anymore, whatever it was he was going to say, about them.

"It appears that my speech cards have been somewhat altered," Malik commented looking at them and replacing them in his pocket.

"You can say that again," Yami said before him and a lot of the table burst out laughing.

"I am thankful I wrote backups," everyone's faces fell and the laughing ceased, "but unfortunately I forgot them," Malik stated pulling out a dagger form his inner pocket. The miner chuckling that had been going on about Malik's forgetfulness and the fact that everyone else knew that Isis had them, had died when Malik pulled out the shiny, pointy, silver object.

"With my best regards I would like to offer Jou this dagger," he then threw it at him and Jou ducked as the dagger became lodged in the back of his chair.

"What's that for?" Jou demanded, pulling it out and examining it.

"For a suicide attempt," everyone looked at him in absolute shock, "women are a right pain," he stated proudly but whimpered when he was surrounded by three very angry women and one rebellious teenager.

"Any last words," Shizuka hissed, making Malik gulp nervously.

"Um…point in motion," and he did not like the consequences of his cheek though no one really minded.

"Well that puts an end to that entertaining speech," Yuugi stated crossing his arms and laughing.

"Aww, and it was just getting interesting," Mokuba whine and Seto smirked, even though Mokuba was a teenager he still had his childish streak, they all did, especially Jou.

"But on the mention of children _Katsuya_ children," Yami started before grabbing a whole champagne bottle and downing it in one gulp.

"Yami!" Anzu cried snatching the bottle from his grasp.

"Come on guys, it's time to cut the cake, and after that, presents," Jou stated cheerfully picking up a knife that lay beside the enormous, delicious looking, cake. Soon everyone had a piece and was eating happily, no one seemed to notice that Yami had downed at least five whole bottles of champagne on his own and had just finished his sixth.

Suddenly Yami stood up abruptly pushing his chair down to the floor and his legs wobbled due to his drunken state, "You're all idiots!" With that statement made Yami promptly fainted falling backwards onto his fallen chair.

"YAMI!" Yuugi cried going down by him and Bakura burst out laughing.

"Bakura!" Anzu scolded shutting him up, but he still had a grin on his face, "what's so funny?" she demanded.

"The 'oh so great', I-can-do-no-wrong, Pharaoh, just got…DRUNK!" and then he burst out laughing again as did everyone else just as Yami came too, but he was still drunk.

He then leapt up onto the table leaving Yuugi to pull up his chair and everyone stared at him as he began to fake pole dance. "Yami Mouto get you butt of the table right this minute," Anzu commanded firmly, stamping her foot making her dress flutter.

"Gees buddy, I didn't know you could _that_!" Jou stated a miner amount of drool leaking from his open mouth.

"I'm starting to rethink marrying you Jounouchi Shizuka Katsuya," Mai stated glaring at him, "if you're going to drool over married _men_!"

"Oh Mai, I'm sorry," Jou exclaimed looking at her with his large, amber tinted, brown puppy eyes. She couldn't resist but smile at him and he kissed her making her giggle slightly, Malik rolled his eyes at the mad behaviour that was going on.

"Ah, get off of me woman!" Yami shrieked in his drunken state trying to push Anzu off him, he was sitting in his chair, and Anzu was on his lap.

"No," Anzu stated firmly, bracing herself against the table in order to keep Yami down.

"Aww man, no fun," Yami whined acting as though he were a ten year old child that had just been denied chocolate, he crossed his arms and pouted looking at Anzu who grinned at him.

"Nope, sorry mister but that look isn't working this time around," Anzu, stated firmly making herself comfortable.

"Well that's entertaining," Ryou, commented smiling at the couple, Yuugi had re-entered his seat and conversations then began.

"Well at least Yami has a little more control, I mean," Seto Kaiba started, deliberately glancing at Bakura and Mariku who were downing bottle after bottle of alcohol faster than those in the Guinness Book of Records. "Those two…could set a new world record…someone aught to remove the alcohol form the vicinity," was his final comment before Ryou and Malik took his advice.

Although their attempt was short lived when they found hands in their faces, fingers outspread and Sennen eyes glowing on the Yamis' foreheads, "Omae o korosu," the two stated in sink before both fell forward in a dead faint.

"Well that was short lived," Mokuba commented laughing along with Shizuka and a lot of the others present.

"Drunken Yamis' disgraceful," Yami stated now that he was subdued and drowning himself in lemonade and water.

"You're one to talk," Honda said looking over at Yami who blushed a bright crimson at being caught out.

"He's right Yami, you're no better," Yuugi said as he and Anzu both looked at him and both leaned over and kissed him on either cheek, "and we love you for it."

"Some of us have just eaten you know," Bakura snarled clutching his stomach and giving a fake sick expression, somehow he and Mariku could deal with alcohol better than Yami could.

"I swear Yuugi's too much like a girl, there so…detestable," Malik sighed relaxing in the glow of four fierce glares he was receiving from four very pissed off females'.

"Oh come on Malik, I saw you with a girl, you and Mariku both," Malik's eyes snapped open and both him and his Yami stared at him in shock.

"Malik's courting?" Bakura demanded laughing hysterically and the two glares he received from the Egyptians only served his humour.

"Well at least he's got a girl Bakura," Seto stated looking at the laughing Yami who subdued himself enough to produce a full force glare, which he sent at Seto.

"And what about…" he trailed off when he saw Isis's hand locked in Seto's, Seto smirked as he followed Bakura's gaze.

"Well Ryou hasn't got a girlfriend either," Bakura said sharply crossing his arms and looking away from everybody.

"Actually Yami, I'm engaged," Ryou announced showing everyone's awe struck faces a silver engagement ring.

Bakura's draw dropped, "You are kidding aren't you?" Ryou shook his head, a grin on his face, "I can't be the only one here without a girl!" Bakura cried out. Honda held up a picture of him and Miho, Mokuba lifted Shizuka's hand with his, Seto shoed his and Isis's hand, Ryou shoed his engagement ring, Yami, Yuugi, Anzu, Jou and Mai all had wedding rings and Malik and Mariku showed a picture of themselves and a girl. "This is so embarrassing," Bakura, muttered his cheeks going slightly red, however much he tried to hide it.

"Don't worry Bakura," Bakura looked up at Shizuka who was calling at him from the other end of the table, "you got the looks, there's gotta be a girl who you like, cause there's loads that like you!"

"I hope you're not one of them," Mokuba stated and everyone laughed including Shizuka.

"No Mokuba, you the one I like," Shizuka stated proudly wrapping her arms around Mokuba's neck and he kissed her."

"Aww, sweet," Mai cooed and Jou kissed her making her giggle again, she'd probably had a little too much to drink, she was giggling so much.

"Well I see that Jou raised you well Shizuka you have good taste," Seto Kaiba commented smirking making Shizuka blush and Jou grinned.

"I know…I'm great," he stated proudly puffing out his chest.

"Open mouth, insert foot," Honda stated rolling his eyes and placing his head in one hand leaning on his elbow which was placed on the table.

Mai elbowed him in the ribs and declared, "Not when who ego gets bigger than you are and your head swells," she stated crossing her arms.

"However in your case Mai," Seto started, she looked at him, "I pity you, he's your problem now!"

"Hey," Jou cried out having been referred to as a 'problem', a dog was bearable but a 'PROBLEM'!

"I know," Mai, replied looking between an infuriated Jou and a smirking Seto Kaiba, she sighed, "it's bit late to get a better model really isn't it?" she suggested.

"MAI!" Jou shouted, nearly raising the roof as he stood up pushing his chair to the floor much like Yami had done, except under different circumstances.

"Oh shut up you, I was joking, I wouldn't trade you for the world and everything in it," Mai explained grabbing Jou and pulling his head down for a kiss, which he responded to all to happily.

"I would," Yami, stated smirking, Jou and Mai were too occupied to notice but Anzu did and she hit him in the head with her elbow.

"I hope you don't mean the same for me," she muttered glaring at Yami who shook his head hurriedly and kissed her making her happy again.

"Oh well, this has to have been one of the most eventful weddings I've ever been too," Ryou stated looking around at everybody present.

"I know, I wonder what yours will be like," Malik responded smirking at Ryou whose eyes widened in shock.

"You are _not_ coming then," Ryou said in fear.

"Oh Ryou, you forget I have the Millennium Rod," Malik stated pulling the golden trinket from within his over-jacket and pointing it at Ryou who gulped.

"Oh dear, what have I gotten myself into," Ryou contemplated aloud sighed as Malik replaced the Millennium Rod.

"Well people I think that there's little more to say after what everyone else has said…and done," Isis said standing attracting everyone's attention as she tapped her glass for silence. "That and the fact that Mai and Jou have probably heard a little too much for their liking," Isis commented looking pointedly at her brother who attempted to look innocent but failed miserably, no one was fooled.

"Apart from to say good luck and I hope that you enjoy you married life and possibly…probably parenting life," she sighed at that thought and nearly everyone present except Mai and Jou paled: they just grinned. "I must say that this is the most fun I've had in a long while and I thank you for it, but to conclude, a toast to the bride and groom," Isis called raising her class high.

"Here, here!" came the responsive cheers as they all raised their glasses high above their heads and they clinked together, Mai and Jou blushed and kissed once again.

"You too better be off if you want to catch your plain tomorrow," Yuugi exclaimed and everyone nodded. They all stood up and accompanied the newly wed couple to the front door where the white limo draped in cream and light pink ribbons waited. Mai was about to walk towards it when Jou swept her into his arms and carried her to the car, her arms flew around his neck and she kissed him.

She waved goodbye as he placed her inside and he closed the door, he turned and winked at everyone else, "I can't wait to be at your weddings' guys, it'll be…interesting," and with that he dashed around to the other side and dove into the car.

"We'll look forward to it Jou!" Ryou called out waving goodbye, as did everyone else as the pair drove away.

**~I hope you enjoyed it, please review! ^_^**


End file.
